Face the Padel Fear: when you can´t blame your partner
Three elements lead the path to padel fear. How do they add up in padel performance? The not-so freaky post by Padel Trainer´s crew that tackles padelers greatest fear: can´t blame your partner for whatever the outcome is. When the result of your ill sportsmanship: whether technical, physical, tactical is the final outcome and there is only us to blame fear appears in its biggest and wildest shape. Although you can beat the dark, ride wild roller coasters, serve in combat, fight fires and perform dangerous stunts when we are the only ones left to blame. The consequences of our underperformance are the ones we carry to dread fear avenue. Irrelevance, disappointment and rejection, those three elements that summarize a padeler greatest failure.
- Irrelevance: We thrive for relevance through meaningful work. Being wanted and needed, knowing we are recognized as a valued partner for matches, warm-ups, whatever kind of padel training we consider is a conquer within the game. Even if we are acknowledged as sparring for another good player is a recognition. Being the complete opposite in a mainly social sport is part of the failure fear.
- Rejection: No matter how much courage we have summoned or how firmly we´ve convinced ourselves we do not care about the outcome and how much healthy self-esteem we possess hearing NO hurts on the inside regardless of the intensity we apply to rejection. Not being chosen to join a team, to qualify for a tournament, to become the partner of the desired player means we are underperforming.
- Disappointment: Disappointment happens to open the path to irrelevance and ultimately rejection. Unless your partner is clueless and lacks all self-awareness, chances are he or she knows about the ways he has failed you and most likely wishes he could apologize in an atmosphere of acceptance.
How does your mind become your honest ally?
Losing a match is not a big deal. It just means someone else played better than you did. While we may feel uncomfortable about not being subjects of victory, the bottom line here is the disappointment of the result achieved in the test of your padel skills. Is it really the consequences of losing a match what we fear? There are present and realistic negative consequences of losing. That is the real fear, those consequences.
Please DO note the mind has an unbelievable ability to create horror stories, even when there is almost no chance of those events actually happening. At the same let us underline the fact that that the only way to challenge our mind´s ability to create fiction is to go with the story, setting it against reality and facts.
When checked under reality 99% of times we realize that the fear of losing is empty and dismiss it as unrealistic. That´s when our negative mind starts losing power over us. Just because we don´t believe our negative mind anymore. The first and hardest step in this process is realizing that it is not you doing the thinking: it´s the mind.
And it is you who must make the conscious choice whether to follow the thought or dismiss it as unrealistic and unhelpful in achieving your goals. Look fear right into the face. Irrelevance, rejection, and disappointment might be the consequences of past actions. You have the present at this instant to be fully tackled, worked and performed.
Negative outcomes are real, losing is one of them and you must accept it. That is, you must be willing to endure the negative consequences of losing a match. Our minds can make us view these negative consequences so as to lose perspective of what “horrible” really is. Compared to real suffering, the anxiety you´d endure because you lost your #3 ranking and dropped to #5 is something that can easily be handled.
Your goal is to be 100% sure that you want to play and that you accept the possibility of losing and all the consequences that go along with losing. Only then will you be free to play unburdened. As long as there is a tiny part of you not accepting the negative consequences of losing, you will be nervous and unable to fully concentrate on the match. In other words, some part of your mind will be pulling against you instead of with you in the direction of winning and going for it.
Why? Because going for it increases the chances of losing and experiencing pain. It comes in the same coin. The one you are playing with. Losing a padel match is likely to be painful. But we must completely accept all the consequences that come with it if you want to be 100% focused and determined to reach your ultimate goal. Only then your mind becomes your honest ally.
A toast to your beating your mind, from the game-changers team. Happy Halloween gamechangers!